Whilst american in its outlook (and language!) – I can’t help but note that I have observed the same car owner behaviour in the UK. Seths writing, however, always makes me smile…..
I was pedaling along Anza. This lady passed me so close I could smell her moist panties even though the windows to her SUV were shut tight.
“Fuck,” I thought, wondering if Sherri Foxworthy would be angry because it had taken two full sentences to launch the f-bomb. “That was closer than a porn star’s razor.”
The real problem, aside from being insane-as-proven-by-the-decision-to-ride-a-bike-to-work, was clear. How can I keep the murderers and negligent-homiciders from plowing me under?
Hundreds of commutes had given me the knowledge to classify cagers as follows:
- Scumfucks who intentionally want to kill me.
- Dumbfucks who don’t know I’m there.
- Law enforcement.
- Babes who think I’m hot.
The fact is that Scumfucks Who Intentionally Want to Kill Me have the upper hand and can’t be denied. So when my number is up, I hope you’ll attend my funeral and NOT say anything sappy like “He died doing…
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